We Could Teach This Performance Coach a Few Things

Apparently, men over 30 are more likely to see changes in their physiques. Pizza doesn't metabolize as quickly as it used to, and partying is just a catalyst for calories. That 32" waist seems to be growing.

But hottie Simon Thomsen seems to have a solution. He specializes in keeping men entering the second third of their lives in shape. Conversely, Simon thinks having self-esteem is also important.

"If you worry about what others think, you might just end up thinking like them," he writes in one post.

Although we don't know Simon's orientation, he did try testicles one time in his life. On the podcast "Testi Time," he tried to choke some down with host Pauly Long; they were the cow variety, but they still count.

"Fear Factor" pranks aside, Simon is a handsome daddy with lots of muscles. His chest would make a perfect papasan chair to curl up on when you need some comforting. He says he's a performance coach, but I don't think that's going to be a problem.